Game of Thrones: Season 3

• SportsAndLady

  

  Automatik;1459141 wrote:Yeah they have some elitest notion because they took the time to read the books. It's retarded.
  
  I plan on reading them and actually have the first 2. I just don't give a fuck to do it right now. I'm enjoying the show...I don't get why the book nerds don't just let that be.
  
  The same shit happens on another forum I frequent. The mods actually did something about it and split the threads. One for the show with no spoilers and another for the book nerds to post whatever and wank each other.

  I threw that idea out on here. But a) the mods on here are lazy and suck and b) the book readers feel they need to post on here that they've read the book and "omg I have spoilers but I'm not gonna say he he he he he!!"
• SportsAndLady

  

  TedSheckler;1459143 wrote:I AM better than you.

  [SP]That's the same type of attitude Joffrie had..and look what happens to him..[/SP]
  
  
• TedSheckler

  

  SportsAndLady;1459145 wrote:[SP]That's the same type of attitude Joffrie had..and look what happens to him..[/SP]
  
  

  SportsAndLady;1452311 wrote:It's Joffrey.
  
  Joffrey.

  
  
• ohiobucks1

  

  I read more books than any of you little fucks giving away spoilers. Go fuck yourselves. I hate you all (cept manhattan, he seems chill). Youre not cool bc you read a book. You would be cool if you wrote a book. But none of you have. So go fuck yourselves
• TedSheckler

  

  ohiobucks1;1459217 wrote:Youre not cool bc you read a book. You would be cool if you wrote a book. But none of you have.

  Note: FWK is cool. Got it. Thanks!
• ohiobucks1

  

  TedSheckler;1459228 wrote:Note: FWK is cool. Got it. Thanks!

  FWK is never cool. He could literally by Miles Davis's Saxophone player and he wouldn't be cool.
• Manhattan Buckeye

  No reason to post spoilers....and again, anyone that suffered through A Feast for Crows and A Dance with Dragons deserves a medal. Here is a synopsis.
  
  Words are wind, which is why this post is full of fluff and that is no cruel jape. Not sure where whores go, but I'm sure they've slept with Lancel and Moon Boy for all I know. If I look back I am lost, yet the fat man creates red herring characters who may or may not have a point. As I broke my fast with canned tuna I realized that the last two books were a Mummer's farce, but yet you know nothing Manhattan Buckeye. You read books that were 80% self-reflection and 20% plot development, the latter of which would never be published in the first place.
• ohiobucks1

  

  Da fuq did I just read lol
• SportsAndLady

  

  ohiobucks1;1459302 wrote:Da fuq did I just read lol

  
  Seriously. No fucking idea.
• Automatik

  

  Full retard has been achieved.
• Manhattan Buckeye

  Not if you read the books. If I'm full retard, so is one of the best Amazon.com posters that posted something more detailed and better. Without spoilers, I can't describe much and more, or little and less (again, inside joke).
  
  If you expect GOT to be awesome beyond next season, then the producers need to deviate heavily from GRRM's books. Don't say you weren't warned.
• Automatik

  

  Thanks for the warning bro!!!!
• Manhattan Buckeye

  You are welcome, I'll redact the review I noted: this is Amazon.com, not me, but it is brilliant:
  
  (why yes, I am mocking GRRM's stylistic excess as part of this review)
  
  He broke his fast with boiled neeps, and shivering stew, washed down with a flagon of Dornish ale. The grease from stewed salt pork clung to his gristly beard as he donned a slashed velvet doublet of purple satin, emblazoned with the crest of Ser Eddard Bauer. Over his smallclothes, he wore black pantaloons. He clambered into his Honda and began the short journey west, bearing northwards along the interstate. He turned left, edging his way past opposing traffic. If I look back, I am lost.
  
  His office was a dull brown keep that sat astride the Crown Road. His desk was hidden behind a soundproofed beige cubicle and was lined with a faux wood finish. Reek, reek, it rhymes with teak.
  
  He had finished A Dance with Dragons not a noonsday before and wondered if in truth he had finished the entire series. George R. R. Martin is so constipated from the fawnings of his lickspittles and self-indulgent side stories that he's not like to drop another turd of a novel anytime soon, if the last decade has told it true, he thought to himself.
  
  He smirked at his own witticism. "It is known" he said aloud to himself.
  
  To tell it true, he had enjoyed several parts of the novel. [redacte] first chapter was strong, as were the [redacted] and [redacted] chapters. He'd not expected that. Many of the early story arcs had glistened wetly with promise but of these Martin had written little and less as the book wore on. Of [redacted's] aimless navel-gazing, there'd been much and more. [Redacted] and [redacted] vied for the distinction of the most pointless [redacted] POV. [Redacted] had twisted her teats for naught, for [redacted's] chapters proved to be as useless as nipples on a breastplate. Gods be good, he thought, the fat man teased us with [redacted's] chapters for.... this?
  
  And [redacted]... that had been the cruelest jape of all. Best that Martin had left out [redacted]. Though, given the masturbatory excess of Dance's prose, Martin could have learned a thing or two from a man who'd had to make do without his sword hand.
  
  The epilogue was a satisfying end to an unsavory meal, but even the most succulent lemoncake doesn't salvage a bland and unfilling meal of gruel. In truth, it should've been left in A Feast for Crows, along with [redacted] chapters. At least then at least one of the novels from the last ten years would've amounted to more than a mummer's farce.
  
  He set down his copy of A Dance with Dragons with an unsatisfying thud. Words are wind, he mused. Speaking of which... He raised a leg and broke his word. It smelt of stale bacon grease and mashed neeps.
  
  By then, his bladder was full to bursting from the morning's coffee, so he headed to the latrine before he pissed his smallclothes. Reek, reek, it rhymes with leak. Along the way, he passed the receptionist from the adjoining office. She was a pretty brown-haired thing, a woman of about four-and-twenty, fully flowered.
  
  "Where do whores go?", he asked her.
  
  She slapped him.
  
  He entered the men's bathroom and undid his breeches. The urinals were crofted from gleaming white porcelain and bore the seal of American Standard. Whilst it received his golden stream of the morning's piss, he contemplated how this was a metaphor for how Ser Martin had raised the leg and done the same to the continuity of A Song of Ice and Fire and the first three books.
  
  He angrily composed an e-mail to Martin's editor whilst zipping up his breeches. He was only a man grown, unskilled in the ways of editing, but such was his wroth.
  
  You know nothing, Anne Groell..."
  
  
  
  GRRM wrote two really bad books in 10 years, and after next season HBO has to go in a different direction. I didn't go full retard. GRRM did.
• Automatik

  

  Nah, you did.
• Manhattan Buckeye

  Ok then, don't get angry at me because I warned you. "Nah, you did"...did you read the books? They sucked. Nothing happens. GRRM wrote 2,000 pages of crap.
• Automatik

  

  We don't care. How have you not figured that out yet? :laugh:
• Manhattan Buckeye

  No, because I'm full retard.
  
  I'm not the writer that ruined favorite characters. It isn't even shocking anymore. If the next book came out next month I'm not sure I'd even bother reading it. If nothing else, the show might provide some sort of finality, because there's no way GRRM will do it. He's written himself into a quagmire. He has nearly 20 POV characters currently.
• SportsAndLady

  

  Automatik;1459360 wrote:We don't care. How have you not figured that out yet? :laugh:

  
  This is baffling to me. Absolutely baffling.
• Automatik

  

  Andddd he's still going. :laugh:
• TedSheckler

  

  The crossbow scene with Joffrey and Margaery doesn't happen in the books.
• Manhattan Buckeye

  C'mon man, no spoilers.
  
  We don't want people to be upset when the fifth season is about descriptions of food, quests that lead to no where, and every current character being in a different place than other characters.
• ohiobucks1

  

  Manhattan Buckeye;1459407 wrote:C'mon man, no spoilers.
  
  We don't want people to be upset when the fifth season is about descriptions of food, quests that lead to no where, and every current character being in a different place than other characters.

  And it continues...
• Automatik

  

  I don't get upset over fictional television shows.
• wes_mantooth

  

  Automatik;1459436 wrote:I don't get upset over fictional television shows.

  I was about to agree...but then I remembered that I did scream at my tv when Sopranos ended...lol
• Heretic

  

  Automatik;1459436 wrote:I don't get upset over fictional television shows.

  This is not fiction. DAMN IT!