Any crazy ex stories?

• OneBuckeye

  

  My wife's cousin told us she was with her "friend" who saw her ex's car in the beach parking lot. She went to her car, got a frisbee, took shit in said frisbee then rubbed her shit over the doorhandles and exterior of the car.
• ernest_t_bass

  

  Raw Dawgin' it;1195538 wrote:Speaking of crazy wife stories - you guys here the one where someone put out thavoices cigarette and his wife had the bigger balls to stand up to the guy? that was a good one,

  Infraction. Reported.
• Raw Dawgin' it

  

  ernest_t_bass;1195597 wrote:Infraction. Reported.

  Why? Did i attack you personally? I reported you for derailing the thread.
• mcburg93

  

  Not a real good story but did have an ex that threw knives at me for being late home from work. I moved out after I hid all the knives.
• Raw Dawgin' it

  

  mcburg93;1195630 wrote:Not a real good story but did have an ex that threw knives at me for being late home from work. I moved out after I hid all the knives.

  Seems like this could actually be a good story ha
• SnotBubbles

  

  Raw Dawgin' it;1195632 wrote:Seems like this could actually be a good story ha

  That's mild for Mechanicsturd....
• like_that

  

  ernest_t_bass;1195597 wrote:Infraction. Reported.

  
  Can you not derail the thread? I'm
  Trying to read these funny stories. Thanks.
• Raw Dawgin' it

  

  like_that;1195637 wrote:Can you not derail the thread? I'm
  Trying to read these funny stories. Thanks.

  Did you post one yet?
• mcburg93

  

  Raw Dawgin' it;1195632 wrote:Seems like this could actually be a good story ha

  Not really I got home after working a few hours overtime. She was mad and wanted to argue I just ignored her took a shower. when I went to get dressed the first knife come flying by my head I turned around to see the next four in mid air. She wasnt very good at throwing knives. I let her calm down and talked her into going getting some groceries. Packed my bags while she was gone and got the fuck out. She called me a few times and just told her I valued my life to much to stay with her. That was it no more calls and havent seen her since.
  

  SnotBubbles;1195635 wrote:That's mild for Mechanicsturd....

  Was gonna report for picking on my town but it really is a turd lol.
• justincredible

  

  ernest_t_bass;1195597 wrote:Infraction. Reported.

  There is zero reason to keep posting infraction in any and every thread you see something. From here on out I will consider it trolling. Reporting a post is fine. Doing this is just annoying to everyone. Please stop.
• SnotBubbles

  

  justincredible;1195650 wrote:There is zero reason to keep posting infraction in any and every thread you see something. From here on out I will consider it trolling. Reporting a post is fine. Doing this is just annoying to everyone. Please stop.

  Infraction. You called him annoying. Reported.
• ohiobucks1

  

  Not close to as good as the other stories but here is my craziest:
  
  I dated a girl for like 2 years in college and then we broke up. The break up was fine and for a little while she left me alone. However, she started coming to parties at my house again like a month later. One night I brought another girl back to my room and wouldnt you know it, my ex shows up in my room. Starts yelling at the girl calling her a "whore" and "slut" and saying a random ass line I'll never forgert: "Youre so stupid you cannot even spell library" lol.
  
  Anyways, I tell her to GTFO out of my room to which she punches me in the face. She keeps trying to punch but by then I just held her arms down and escorted her out of my house locked the door and went back into my room. Never really heard from her again after that (she transferred).
• ernest_t_bass

  

  justincredible;1195650 wrote:There is zero reason to keep posting infraction in any and every thread you see something. From here on out I will consider it trolling. Reporting a post is fine. Doing this is just annoying to everyone. Please stop.

  
  Oh.
• ernest_t_bass

  

  ohiobucks1;1195722 wrote:Not close to as good as the other stories but here is my craziest:
  
  I dated a girl for like 2 years in college and then we broke up. The break up was fine and for a little while she left me alone. However, she started coming to parties at my house again like a month later. One night I brought another girl back to my room and wouldnt you know it, my ex shows up in my room. Starts yelling at the girl calling her a "whore" and "slut" and saying a random ass line I'll never forgert: "Youre so stupid you cannot even spell library" lol.
  
  Anyways, I tell her to GTFO out of my room to which she punches me in the face. She keeps trying to punch but by then I just held her arms down and escorted her out of my house locked the door and went back into my room. Never really heard from her again after that (she transferred).

  
  Did you still get laid?
• Devils Advocate

  

  ernest_t_bass;1195745 wrote:Oh.

  Io
• skank

  

  I got ya all beat. While in HS, I was at my gf's house, and for some unknown reason, I was on my best friends bike, (don't ask me why, it was like 25 years ago). Anyway, we got into an argument, and I got on his bike and started to ride away, she gets into her sisters car and comes after me. She's driving real slow beside me calling me a bunch of names, (I'm riding on the sidewalk), without looking at her, I just keep riding, looking straight ahead flipping her off. Here's where I made my mistake, I come to an intersection and ride over the curb and turn left at the intersection. I thought she went straight, but seconds later, I hear an engine, and trust me, it's approaching rapidly, next thing I know, I'm airborn. Tore my hand up pretty good, (I'm very lucky that's all), my buddies bike was really messed up.
• gorocks99

  

  skank;1195774 wrote:I got ya all beat. While in HS, I was at my gf's house, and for some unknown reason, I was on my best friends bike, (don't ask me why, it was like 25 years ago). Anyway, we got into an argument, and I got on his bike and started to ride away, she gets into her sisters car and comes after me. She's driving real slow beside me calling me a bunch of names, (I'm riding on the sidewalk), without looking at her, I just keep riding, looking straight ahead flipping her off. Here's where I made my mistake, I come to an intersection and ride over the curb and turn left at the intersection. I thought she went straight, but seconds later, I hear an engine, and trust me, it's approaching rapidly, next thing I know, I'm airborn. Tore my hand up pretty good, (I'm very lucky that's all), my buddies bike was really messed up.

  She ran you over?
  
  
  
  Hardcore.
• skank

  

  gorocks99;1195775 wrote:She ran you over?
  
  
  
  
  Hardcore.

  
  
  I was never technically under the car, she did however hit me, and she was going fast. If she hadn't stopped after the initial contact, I would have been under the car.
  
  Hey, at least she didn't rub shit on my door handles, like in onebuckeyes post.
• Tigerfan00

  

  mcburg93;1195630 wrote:Not a real good story but did have an ex that threw knives at me for being late home from work. I moved out after I hid all the knives.

  Were you wearing a hoodie when you came home?
• rmolin73

  

  Raw Dawgin' it;1195249 wrote:This - also, be more specific about the type of crazy? I had an ex call me crying and tell me she blew another guy she met that day. A week later she wanted to get back together but I found out she was banging some black dude - She turned into a crazy whore who got a reputation around her dorm for being easy, especially with the blackies.

  Heyyyyyyy:mad: ................ No that's actually funny as hell.
• Laley23

  

  Just one really.
  
  Cut herself for about 6 months after. I/we were young (SO/Summer before JR year in HS) and I had no clue how to handle it. I had been dating her for about 18 months and we had been having sex since month number 2 when we were 15. I would try to break it off completely, but she was friends with a lot of the girls at my school (thank God she went to a different HS). So we would run into each other a lot, and she was having major issues.
  
  Parents divorced, crazy mom pushing her to drop out of school to pursue modeling. One day her best friend calls me saying she is all kinds of fucked up. Pills, alcohol, etc and at a party at a frat house at UT. Well, Im not a complete dick, so I go to pick her up, drive her back to her moms, and as I am taking a piss and ready to leave she gets off the couch and grabs a knife. Says, "I want to show you something." I am freaking out. This chick is about to cut herself in front of me, and I had seen the scares to know she wasnt fucking around. I ask what I can do to get the knife from her, and her response is quite hot, honestly.
  
  "Fuck me till my voice is gone." Of course, as a 17 year old straight male, I oblige. Also, cause fuck watching someone cut themselves in front of you. Go for like 90 minutes (not one time, I aint that good) and her crazy mom comes home. I am now stuck up in her room for the forseeable future, as the moms room is on the first floor. She finally sobers up at like 6am (about 5 hours later) and tells me she will distract her mom if we can wake her with sex. WTF? I said ok. Got my nuts off in like 5 minutes, not loud, and walked out the front door. I didnt give a shit anymore now that she was sober.
  
  At least she was hot as hell.
• Speedofsand

  

  justincredible;1195650 wrote:There is zero reason to keep posting infraction in any and every thread you see something. From here on out I will consider it trolling. Reporting a post is fine. Doing this is just annoying to everyone. Please stop.

  QQ
• justincredible

  

  Speedofsand;1195841 wrote:QQ

  It's my website and I'll QQ if I want to.
• goosebumps

  

  Yeah the whole slitting the wrist thing is fucked.
  
  Well my story involves a crazy ex and crazy ex's mom
  
  I dated a girl last year for about a month. Asked if I could check the score of the Red's game on her blackberry bc my phone had died. A text came from her ex bf, wouldn't have clicked on it if the word sex wasn't in it. Needless to say figured out that she was cheating on me pretty quick. We were at her aunts house watching her nieces at the time and had just put them to bed. I was so pissed I couldn't see straight, but refused to scream at her with kids in the house so I just jumped in my car and left. Well she lived in a cul-de-sac so I had to go turn around to get out. She's laying in the middle of the street screaming for me to just run her over bc she can't live without me. (one month relationship...) I tell her to move and I would pull back into my parking spot and we could talk. She moved and I sped away.
  
  I wouldn't respond to her texts or calls but one day her mom called me and I answered she's furious. She's screaming at me for dumping her daughter and is telling me that I'm immature and led her daughter on. I'm assuming at this point that she doesn't realize her daughter is a whore, so I enlighten her. Well she was fully aware that her daughter had cheated on me already and continued to tear into me about how if I was a good guy like I said I was that I would forgive her and let her make it up to me. Fucking crazy. It got worse though.
  
  Her friend calls me the next day to tell me that she was in the hospital. Slit her wrist the night before and was in the psych ward. Luckily her friend was on my side over the whole thing and said that the girl was bat shit crazy and had done something like that before with a previous bf. Maybe 6 months go by and I get a text from the same friend again telling me that my ex was asking about me and wondered if I'd be interested in getting dinner sometime haha. I would rather stick my dick in razor wire.
  
  Never in my life thought I would get myself into something like that. Girls are literally crazy. Decided after her to just enjoy the rest of school and not start looking for anything serious until after I graduated.
  
  
  Moral of the story (and if you're from Cincinnati you already know this) Girls from the West side are fucked in the head.
• Mr Miyagi

  

  I had an ex who shit in a frisbee and rub it all over my doorhandles