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What would you do if your spouses father was a sex offender?

  • Ytowngirlinfla
    So I just found this out via google search that he's a registered sex offender in Utah. He never told me and he hasn't seen his father in like 8 or 9 years. He talks to him on occasion. Should I approach the hubs and ask why he never told me or even if he knows?
  • Commander of Awesome
    Getting advice from strangers on the message board is the best way to approach this.
  • Raw Dawgin' it
    Ytowngirlinfla;1196367 wrote:So I just found this out via google search that he's a registered sex offender in Utah. He never told me and he hasn't seen his father in like 8 or 9 years. He talks to him on occasion. Should I approach the hubs and ask why he never told me or even if he knows?
    What's the point? why do you care he didn't yell you? sounds like you're just trying to pick a fight because he didn't tell you something that makes no difference to your relationship.
  • Raw Dawgin' it
    Also - this isn't a personal attack but women always start things over dumb shit. He hasn't seen his father in a decade, so clearly he's threat to your children...
  • like_that
    Raw Dawgin' it;1196372 wrote:What's the point? why do you care he didn't yell you? sounds like you're just trying to pick a fight because he didn't tell you something that makes no difference to your relationship.
    My thoughts exactly. Typical women trying to make it about herself.

    He probably hasn't told you, because it is one of his few skeletons in the closet that he isn't proud of.
  • Ytowngirlinfla
    Raw Dawgin' it;1196372 wrote:What's the point? why do you care he didn't yell you? sounds like you're just trying to pick a fight because he didn't tell you something that makes no difference to your relationship.
    I'm not trying to pick a fight at all. I'm not mad. I'm just wondering why anyone would even talk to a father who did this. Just curious because we may go to Utah to see him in July.
  • Raw Dawgin' it
    Ytowngirlinfla;1196376 wrote:I'm not trying to pick a fight at all. I'm not mad. I'm just wondering why anyone would even talk to a father who did this. Just curious because we may go to Utah to see him in July.
    If you pee near a playground and get caught you register as a sex offender. Maybe you shouldn't assume he fucked little kids...
  • Commander of Awesome
    Well if he hasn't seen his dad in a decade he may not know. You don't have kids, why do you gaf? You wouldn't visit your HUSBAND's father because he was a sex offender. Glad you're so high and mighty.
  • ernest_t_bass
    Hubs? You married now?
  • FatHobbit
    Idk, I think that's something you have to disclose to your spouse. Unless it was a bogus charge where he was peeing in public or something like that.
  • like_that
    Ytowngirlinfla;1196376 wrote:I'm not trying to pick a fight at all. I'm not mad. I'm just wondering why anyone would even talk to a father who did this. Just curious because we may go to Utah to see him in July.
    If your "HUBBY" wants to discuss it, he will.

    /thread
  • Ytowngirlinfla
    Raw Dawgin' it;1196381 wrote:If you pee near a playground and get caught you register as a sex offender. Maybe you shouldn't assume he ****ed little kids...
    Well I looked up the document. He was charged and convicted with raping someone under the age of 14 and I know he was in prison.
  • A PAC
    Maybe this is the reason he doesn't speak with his father. Maybe it's a sore subject wih him. Either way, it doesn't sound like your children ever have to interact with him thank God.
  • Commander of Awesome
    ernest_t_bass;1196385 wrote:Hubs? You married now?
    Oh you didn't know? She only brings it up in EVERY single one of her posts.
  • FatHobbit
    Commander of Awesome;1196383 wrote:Well if he hasn't seen his dad in a decade he may not know.
    Good point
  • justincredible
    FatHobbit;1196387 wrote:Idk, I think that's something you have to disclose to your spouse. Unless it was a bogus charge where he was peeing in public or something like that.
    Absolutely. And even if it was a bogus charge. If it's a bogus charge it's no big deal so just get it out of the way. If it was a more serious charge then it's a much bigger deal, especially if there is still contact. I don't know, it's just something I'd rather find out from my spouse than stumble upon it accidentally.
  • Raw Dawgin' it
    Ytowngirlinfla;1196390 wrote:Well I looked up the document. He was charged and convicted with raping someone under the age of 14 and I know he was in prison.
    How old was he when he did it? Honestly, if it hasn't come up it sounds like a non issue. Girls never cry wolf when they wake up the next morning and realized they had sex with someone they didn't want to.
  • Commander of Awesome
    justincredible;1196397 wrote:Absolutely. And even if it was a bogus charge. If it's a bogus charge it's no big deal so just get it out of the way. If it was a more serious charge then it's a much bigger deal, especially if there is still contact. I don't know, it's just something I'd rather find out from my spouse than stumble upon it accidentally.
    Exactly, she already knew she was going to bring it up, she was looking for justification.

    Also doesn't sound like it was "accidentally" to me.
  • FatHobbit
    Raw Dawgin' it;1196398 wrote:How old was he when he did it? Honestly, if it hasn't come up it sounds like a non issue. Girls never cry wolf when they wake up the next morning and realized they had sex with someone they didn't want to.
    ummmm, unless he was fifteen when it happened, I don't think a fourteen year old can "cry wolf"
  • Ytowngirlinfla
    Raw Dawgin' it;1196398 wrote:How old was he when he did it? Honestly, if it hasn't come up it sounds like a non issue. Girls never cry wolf when they wake up the next morning and realized they had sex with someone they didn't want to.
    It happened less than 4 years ago. He started his prison sentence June 2008 it says but I believe he was just released within this past year. It was a charge and conviction of raping/molesting under the age of 14.
  • Ytowngirlinfla
    Commander of Awesome;1196401 wrote:Exactly, she already knew she was going to bring it up, she was looking for justification.

    Also doesn't sound like it was "accidentally" to me.
    They have the same name so when you google one it links to the other.
  • ernest_t_bass
    Four years ago? She's 18 now? She hot?
  • Commander of Awesome
    Ytowngirlinfla;1196408 wrote:They have the same name so when you google one it links to the other.
    You have an excuse with information you leave out in the initial post for everything.
  • Commander of Awesome
    Same name huh? Was your spouse's father the fall guy?
  • Raw Dawgin' it
    FatHobbit;1196405 wrote:ummmm, unless he was fifteen when it happened, I don't think a fourteen year old can "cry wolf"
    Was more of a general statement.

    Since it happened recently i think it's serious that he did it, but if he hasn't seen him in a decade i don't think it's something you need to bring up with him. If the situation arises where you need to know he'll tell you.