So two weeks ago my wife and I both thought we heard an animal in our dryer vent. We called out a wildlife removal company. He came out and unhooked the vent and basically told us we were crazy and there was no sign of any animal but, our dryer vent is dirty we should get it cleaned.

 Fast forward to today vent cleaner comes out. He starts cleaning the vent and a bird flys out at his face. He yells “son of a bitch” and runs out of my laundry room. I call the wildlife company and tell them I want my money back. Meanwhile the dryer vent guy comes up with the plan to open the window turn off all the lights and hold screens hoping it doesn’t fly down the stairs. He opens the laundry door and it flew out the window. 

So complete disaster was avoided but I think I caused the guy cleaning our vent to have a heart attack.

Had a bat in our house this week!

Took a few minutes to coax it out the door....

My second successful bat extermination.  Years ago a neighbor had me get one out of their house because apparently the man was too much of a pansy to do so himself...

He sounds like a pussy

Oh that is a good one sportshampps. 

New home owner here. The house was recently renovated, so thankfully we have minor things here and there. 

My funny one is I installed a new smart thermostat a few weeks ago. For the old thermostat, I shutoff the power to the furnace/ AC, and to the room, and the damn thing would not shut off. Turns out the old thermostat had an internal battery. Funny how when I researched that model online, that was not mentioned. Once I removed the old one, and put the new smart thermostat up, the wire connections are pretty damn small and next to each other. The way the wires came out of my wall, I mixed the green and white wires. So, while the thermostat was working, it was blowing out cool air. Took me a minute to switch the wires and fix it. 

So far no disasters or animals in the house...yet. The weather is getting warmer and we are near a lake...

posted by sportchampps

I call the wildlife company and tell them I want my money back. 

That was funny!  But definitely was a weak-ass effort by the guy. 

In my first house, thought a bat flew out of my woodburner when I went to build my first fire.  Turned out to be a bird, but it kept flying in a circle around the family room.  Called a buddy who lived nearby, he came over and blocked one side, and we shooed it out the door. 

Same house, second year of owning it -  mouse come in thru the dryer vent, and died inside the exhaust port.  Couldn't fish him out, he was welded to the metal.  The smell was indescribeable, but at least he went out of this world warm and dry.  Yes, I  bought a new dryer.   

.

Did you ever have a bird fly into your garage through the open garage door and then it can’t find its way back out? This has happened to me several times. They are idiots. 

I had a raccoon walk in my garage and it jumped through the window of my 65Mustang and it had 4 babies.

My wife wasn’t as amused as I was.

posted by Devils Advocate

I had a raccoon walk in my garage and it jumped through the window of my 65Mustang and it had 4 babies.

My wife wasn’t as amused as I was.

I feel like that would be an expensive detailing

posted by ptown_trojans_1

Oh that is a good one sportshampps. 

New home owner here. The house was recently renovated, so thankfully we have minor things here and there. 

My funny one is I installed a new smart thermostat a few weeks ago. For the old thermostat, I shutoff the power to the furnace/ AC, and to the room, and the damn thing would shut off. Turns out the old thermostat had an internal battery. Funny how when I researched that model online, that was not mentioned. Once I removed the old one, and put the new smart thermostat up, the wire connections are pretty damn small and next to each other. The way the wires came out of my wall, I mixed the green and white wires. So, while the thermostat was working, it was blowing out cool air. Took me a minute to switch the wires and fix it. 

So far no disasters or animals in the house...yet. The weather is getting warmer and we are near a lake...

How do ya lke the smart thermostat?  Easy for a dumbass to install?

Furnace dumped on Christmas eve and I got a new one, and did have them put in a basic digital one but I am thiniking by next winter I want to have a smart one to program much easier remotely.

Live by a lake. 100' from the channel, 400' from the open water and do have a view of the water from the porch.

Got into the dock lottery but hedged my bets and got a private one a few weeks ago. If I get one in the lottery, and it is a slim chance as they said there are record entrants this year, then I will sublet the one I am renting

posted by Devils Advocate

I had a raccoon walk in my garage and it jumped through the window of my 65Mustang and it had 4 babies.

My wife wasn’t as amused as I was.

Had a coon on the screened in porch a couple of winters ago.   Gnawled through the screen and would escape between the ceiling and roof that the former owner engineered poorly.

Got a solid hit with a baseball bat one night, thought I killed it but it just stunned for a bit.

In theory i would tried....

Antifreeze?  They make it too animal friendly.

Rat poison?  Not strong enough for this monster.

Father in Law had a special mix that they dont make anymore and he gave me some.  Kills em almost instantly...... 

posted by thavoice

How do ya lke the smart thermostat?  Easy for a dumbass to install?

Furnace dumped on Christmas eve and I got a new one, and did have them put in a basic digital one but I am thiniking by next winter I want to have a smart one to program much easier remotely

Yeah, it was easy for a dummy like me to install once I figured out how to remove the old one. My only complaint on it was how close all the wire connections were and hard to read. The letters were too big for the slots so the W wire connection was right over where the G was for example. Lesson learned.  We got a new Honeywell through a deal. We like it as it is more efficient it seems and way easier to program from our phones. Getting the app downloaded and registered through the website was pretty easy too. 

posted by thavoice

Had a coon on the screened in porch a couple of winters ago.   Gnawled through the screen and would escape between the ceiling and roof that the former owner engineered poorly.

Got a solid hit with a baseball bat one night, thought I killed it but it just stunned for a bit.

In theory i would tried....

Antifreeze?  They make it too animal friendly.

Rat poison?  Not strong enough for this monster.

Father in Law had a special mix that they dont make anymore and he gave me some.  Kills em almost instantly...... 

Ouch.  We had a mother and babies invade our attic.   I chased her off my roof one morning, and shot her with wasp spray to keep her away.  Found out later my neighbor killed her with an arrow shot.  He said she was scratching at his door, and thought she had rabies.   

My son and I caught one of the babies alive in the basement and boxed it up for the Critter Control guy.  He found another live one in the basement, and a dead one in the attic.  Whew.  

posted by Zunardo

Ouch.  We had a mother and babies invade our attic.   I chased her off my roof one morning, and shot her with wasp spray to keep her away.  Found out later my neighbor killed her with an arrow shot.  He said she was scratching at his door, and thought she had rabies.   

My son and I caught one of the babies alive in the basement and boxed it up for the Critter Control guy.  He found another live one in the basement, and a dead one in the attic.  Whew.  

Father in law has been very judicious with his special mix as it is no longer made, too inhumane or whatever.   He has had them die with their head in the bowl it is so instant.

They are pain, no doubt about that.  

Could be the old Fly Bait and Coca Cola recipe.

posted by thavoice

Had a bat in our house this week!

Took a few minutes to coax it out the door....

My second successful bat extermination.  Years ago a neighbor had me get one out of their house because apparently the man was too much of a pansy to do so himself...

I've had several, the last one was fairly recent on a Saturday night near midnight after an evening of drinking ......the last thing I needed.  I am about to turn in and I think I see a little movement in one of the guest bedrooms; sure enough he is in there flying in circles; I got all the pertinent doors closed, ran to the garage for a tennis racquet and grabbed an old bath towel - the two items you generally need (unless you can get some windows opened and they glide out).  Gave him a good whack mid-air and then throw the towel on him to gather him up and flip him out the window. 

Installed new windows in the attic and new trim on the outside and a bat ended up getting in the house without anyone knowing.  I fell asleep on the couch and my wife went up to bed.  I wake up to her screaming "something is in the house."  I go upstairs and my wife says something was fluttering by her head and banging into things.  

By the time I got upstairs she had the lights and saw nothing.  With the remodeling I suspected a bat but found nothing.  Banged around nothing.  I then began to wonder if she had some sort of dream.  She said it was real but I could not find anything after searching every room.  So we go to bed.

Couple of days later I am walking down the stairs in the late evening and as I step on the landing a bat is fluttering in my face.  I fall back on the stairs and yell "bat".  My wife is on the couch instantly rolls off the couch and throws a blanket over herself.  Got rid of the bat.

During remodeling I get a lot of scratches and pokes.  I was telling my buddy in the office next to me about it and we were joking that I have been sleeping in the house with the bat for the last two nights.  I joke about being bit and lift up my pant leg and just above my ankle I have to small dots.  

Then the subject of rabies comes up.  You get rabies you are fucked and it is a bad way to go.  He can tell I am getting a little mind fucked.  I head back to my office to move my mind back to work.  Get an email from my buddy just to complete my mind fuck attatched is a video of a dude in Russia dying of rabies.  It got me briefly thinking of the rabies shots.  Anyways that was many years ago.

posted by QuakerOats

I've had several, the last one was fairly recent on a Saturday night near midnight after an evening of drinking ......the last thing I needed.  I am about to turn in and I think I see a little movement in one of the guest bedrooms; sure enough he is in there flying in circles; I got all the pertinent doors closed, ran to the garage for a tennis racquet and grabbed an old bath towel - the two items you generally need (unless you can get some windows opened and they glide out).  Gave him a good whack mid-air and then throw the towel on him to gather him up and flip him out the window. 

posted by Gardens35

Could be the old Fly Bait and Coca Cola recipe.

Ha. It was Pepsi and some blue crystalized material that fizzed up pretty good when it was mixed.

Powerful stuff, no doubt about that.  He said it is not made anymore so he has to be extra careful in rationing it!