My New Co-Worker ...

• O-Trap

  

  I'm beginning to envy Justin of his human garbage disposal co-worker.
  
  I began this new job a week ago, and I love the job, as well as 95% of the work environment.
  
  That 5%? This coworker who sits very close to me.
  
  She sings various inconsequential songs to herself all day, and louder than would be otherwise comfortable in an office. It's rather distracting.
  
  The worse part is, she is CONSTANTLY making snorting, gurgling, and other bodily function sounds. The snorting is like she's trying to hock phlegm (think Seabass in Dumb 'n Dumber), and it's never less than 30 seconds apart once she gets going. The kicker is, she's not sick or anything. It's like a spasmic tick or something, but it's so loud and theatrical, that seems odd (I have a tick disorder as well, and she would be quite an extreme case).
  
  It's like having a tone-deaf, overweight Marry Poppins with a nasty case of bronchitis sitting next to you. Not a whole lot bothers me about people, but this woman makes me want to take bath salts and eat a homeless guy's face.
  
  
  Does anyone have experience with someone like this? How do you deal with it? It's incredibly distracting, not to mention gross.
• THE4RINGZ

  

  PIHB??????
  
  
  /OC'd
• O-Trap

  

  P what IHB?
• Ironman92

  

  Stab her.
• THE4RINGZ

  

  O-Trap;1212238 wrote:P what IHB?

  
  Are you new here?
• THE4RINGZ

  

  Ironman92;1212239 wrote:Stab her.

  
  
  ?????????
• FatHobbit

  

  I used to work with someone who had a mild form of tourettes.
• THE4RINGZ

  

  FatHobbit;1212242 wrote:I used to work with someone who had tourettes.

  One thing on my bucket list is to go to a far away city, visit the local mall and pretend to have severe tourettes to the point I have outbursts. Seems like fun.
• sleeper

  

  Headphones. You're welcome.
• O-Trap

  

  THE4RINGZ;1212240 wrote:Are you new here?

  
  No, but the phrase is "PIIHB." You said "PIHB." My reply was, "P 'what' IHB?"
  

  FatHobbit;1212242 wrote:I used to work with someone who had a mild form of tourettes.

  My cousin has that, and one doctor thinks that's what mine could be as well, but mine's not that bad.
• O-Trap

  

  sleeper;1212246 wrote:Headphones. You're welcome.

  Betting I could still hear her, but I'll try that tomorrow.
• FatHobbit

  

  O-Trap;1212247 wrote:My cousin has that, and one doctor thinks that's what mine could be as well, but mine's not that bad.

  It wasn't bad. She made a little spit/sniff sound every now and then. I didn't even notice after a while.
• Dr. KnOiTaLL

  

  Have you nicely asked her to refrain from singing? I would say that's the first place to start.
• vball10set

  Mock her, and she'll stop
• O-Trap

  

  FatHobbit;1212249 wrote:It wasn't bad. She made a little spit/sniff sound every now and then. I didn't even notice after a while.

  I clear my throat. Went to numerous ENTs who thought it was everything from Acid Reflux Disease to a chronic post-nasal drip. The last guy said it could be a tick, like Tourettes. In any case, there doesn't seem to be any physical reason for it.
• O-Trap

  

  Dr. KnOiTaLL;1212250 wrote:Have you nicely asked her to refrain from singing? I would say that's the first place to start.

  Here's the problem. She's really nice, but seemingly pretty lonely and socially awkward. I'd hate for her to get the idea that I find her annoying as a person or anything. It's just her habits when she works that make me want to lash out in the moment.
• friendfromlowry

  Is she really fat? Fat, annoying people are the worst.
• gut

  Start singing gangsta rap to yourself at your desk. That should give her the hint.
  
  Or get that obnoxious smelling disinfectant spray. Every time she coughs/gurgles/whatever shoot a couple of sprays into the air.
• Belly35

  

  Bang her until she snorting, gurgling
• O-Trap

  

  gut;1212278 wrote:Start singing gangsta rap to yourself at your desk. That should give her the hint.
  
  Or get that obnoxious smelling disinfectant spray. Every time she coughs/gurgles/whatever shoot a couple of sprays into the air.

  See, I need more people like you around for stuff like this.
• ernest_t_bass

  

  I would guess the clearing of the throat is Acid reflux.
• O-Trap

  

  ernest_t_bass;1212331 wrote:I would guess the clearing of the throat is Acid reflux.

  That's what I thought, too, but a scope showed no esophageal damage.
• believer

  

  O-Trap;1212335 wrote:That's what I thought, too, but a scope showed no esophageal damage.

  Keep the snuff cans at home.
• JTizzle

  THE4RINGZ;1212244 wrote:One thing on my bucket list is to go to a far away city, visit the local mall and pretend to have severe tourettes to the point I have outbursts. Seems like fun.

  We used to talk about doing this when I worked for stanley steemer! We had it all planned out too but never went through with it was called Tourettes syndrome Tuesday" I was going to act like I had it and have severe outbreaks in peoples homes then my buddy was going to cover fro me and explain to the customer my problem. Really wish we would of had the balls to try it a few times, we were afraid of hurting business though. Would have been effing great though.
• O-Trap

  

  believer;1212715 wrote:Keep the snuff cans at home.

  Haven't done dip in awhile.
  
  Mofo.
  
  /Belly'd