Tips for surviving the holidays

• Dr.Pizza

  

  Folks, the Holidays are upon us!
  If there is one thing James Winner loves. It’s being with family, friends, and getting presents.
  Presents are cool because for the most part, most people don’t do anything good to deserve presents. Our family and relatives and friends are all just as stupid as one another and buy presents for each other. Black Friday has come and gone, so hopefully everyone got their stupid TVs and idiot electronics and technologies to shut them and the kids up. If there is one thing I don’t like, it’s whiny people who need technologies to enhance their lives. News Flash from jamesweiner.com, Mother Nature makes the best presents of them all. Next time some punk kids are in line at the store and won’t move up in line cause they’re too busy on their brain phones,I’m gonna tell them that Mother Nature is disappointed in them. Maybe that will straighten them up.
  
  With the Holidays, come crappy weathers. So here are a few tips for Holiday driving.
  1. Make sure you give yourself an extra 10-15 minutes to travel to the relatives or the stores. Sometimes the roads are slick and require more careful driving.
  2. Icy roads are very dangerous. A car can hit ice and slip into a ditch if a driver is not being cautious. Drive Slower!!!
  3. If it is snowing and you drive a truck, don’t be an asshole. Don’t drive 70 while the rest of us are practicing safety. I don’t care for when a dumby truck driver splashes all that slush and mess on my windshield. Frankly, it pisses me off.
  4. Keep some blankets in the back seat. You never know when you might break down in the boonies and could freeze. Also, if you have a betty in the car, she’ll appreciate you offering her a blanket and will think you’re really smart for having blankets in the car.
  5. Don’t turn on your radio. All that is on is Christmas music and Christmas music sucks. Some people like it but I don’t see why Frosty the Raindeer coming to town is such a big deal.
  
  General ideas for gifts
  1.Give lots of gum and dental floss cause most people have bad breath and don’t know it. This is a great time to drop them a hint.
  2.I want an Ipad so I can check out jamesweiner.com anywhere I go.
  3.For Him: a set of hair clippers. I don’t need some fancy hair girl messing with my hair when I can do the same damn thing for free and you don’t even have to tip yourself so you save cash and spend it on….
  4.For Her: Some hot lingerie. That’s like a double gift because it works for you fellas and she feels all hot and stuff.
  5.ALWAYS BUY A GIFT THAT YOU LIKE AND CAN USE. One time, I got my mom some wrestling DVDs. She was like “James, what the hell am I gonna do with these” and I said “it’s the thought that counts asshole” and I stormed out of the house. Anyways, now I get to watch Wrestling DVDs! It was a gift for her but in a way it was kind of like I was buying it for myself even though I wasn’t.
  6. Lastly, make sure you offer good tidings. Everyone is so quick to write off tidings. When someone wishes me good tidings, it makes me feel good and want to buy them better gifts the next year.
  
  Hope I was of some help for your Christmas woes. Now maybe you won’t buy a shitty gift and have a niece/nephew/brother/daughter mad at you for the next year. Tis the season of Jolly!!!
• dlazz

  Tis the season of Jolly!
• DeadliestWarrior34

  

  
• Dr Stromboli

  Great read, great thread....thanks.
  
  Also, if you have hemorrhoids during the holidays, check out my site for helpful information.
  
  www.robertdoucher.com
• Dr Stromboli

  Great read, great thread....thanks.
  
  Also, if you have hemorrhoids during the holidays, check out my site for helpful imformation.
  
  www.robertdoucher.com
• LJ

  

  Dr.Pizza;1003142 wrote:Folks, the Holidays are upon us!
  If there is one thing James Winner loves. It’s being with family, friends, and getting presents.
  Presents are cool because for the most part, most people don’t do anything good to deserve presents. Our family and relatives and friends are all just as stupid as one another and buy presents for each other. Black Friday has come and gone, so hopefully everyone got their stupid TVs and idiot electronics and technologies to shut them and the kids up. If there is one thing I don’t like, it’s whiny people who need technologies to enhance their lives. News Flash from jamesweiner.com, Mother Nature makes the best presents of them all. Next time some punk kids are in line at the store and won’t move up in line cause they’re too busy on their brain phones,I’m gonna tell them that Mother Nature is disappointed in them. Maybe that will straighten them up.
  
  With the Holidays, come crappy weathers. So here are a few tips for Holiday driving.
  1. Make sure you give yourself an extra 10-15 minutes to travel to the relatives or the stores. Sometimes the roads are slick and require more careful driving.
  2. Icy roads are very dangerous. A car can hit ice and slip into a ditch if a driver is not being cautious. Drive Slower!!!
  3. If it is snowing and you drive a truck, don’t be an asshole. Don’t drive 70 while the rest of us are practicing safety. I don’t care for when a dumby truck driver splashes all that slush and mess on my windshield. Frankly, it pisses me off.
  4. Keep some blankets in the back seat. You never know when you might break down in the boonies and could freeze. Also, if you have a betty in the car, she’ll appreciate you offering her a blanket and will think you’re really smart for having blankets in the car.
  5. Don’t turn on your radio. All that is on is Christmas music and Christmas music sucks. Some people like it but I don’t see why Frosty the Raindeer coming to town is such a big deal.
  
  General ideas for gifts
  1.Give lots of gum and dental floss cause most people have bad breath and don’t know it. This is a great time to drop them a hint.
  2.I want an Ipad so I can check out jamesweiner.com anywhere I go.
  3.For Him: a set of hair clippers. I don’t need some fancy hair girl messing with my hair when I can do the same damn thing for free and you don’t even have to tip yourself so you save cash and spend it on….
  4.For Her: Some hot lingerie. That’s like a double gift because it works for you fellas and she feels all hot and stuff.
  5.ALWAYS BUY A GIFT THAT YOU LIKE AND CAN USE. One time, I got my mom some wrestling DVDs. She was like “James, what the hell am I gonna do with these” and I said “it’s the thought that counts asshole” and I stormed out of the house. Anyways, now I get to watch Wrestling DVDs! It was a gift for her but in a way it was kind of like I was buying it for myself even though I wasn’t.
  6. Lastly, make sure you offer good tidings. Everyone is so quick to write off tidings. When someone wishes me good tidings, it makes me feel good and want to buy them better gifts the next year.
  
  Hope I was of some help for your Christmas woes. Now maybe you won’t buy a shitty gift and have a niece/nephew/brother/daughter mad at you for the next year. Tis the season of Jolly!!!

  
• Ironman92

  

  Dr.Pizza;1003142 wrote:Folks, the Holidays are upon us!
  If there is one thing James Winner loves. It’s being with family, friends, and getting presents.
  Presents are cool because for the most part, most people don’t do anything good to deserve presents. Our family and relatives and friends are all just as stupid as one another and buy presents for each other. Black Friday has come and gone, so hopefully everyone got their stupid TVs and idiot electronics and technologies to shut them and the kids up. If there is one thing I don’t like, it’s whiny people who need technologies to enhance their lives. News Flash from jamesweiner.com, Mother Nature makes the best presents of them all. Next time some punk kids are in line at the store and won’t move up in line cause they’re too busy on their brain phones,I’m gonna tell them that Mother Nature is disappointed in them. Maybe that will straighten them up.
  
  With the Holidays, come crappy weathers. So here are a few tips for Holiday driving.
  1. Make sure you give yourself an extra 10-15 minutes to travel to the relatives or the stores. Sometimes the roads are slick and require more careful driving.
  2. Icy roads are very dangerous. A car can hit ice and slip into a ditch if a driver is not being cautious. Drive Slower!!!
  3. If it is snowing and you drive a truck, don’t be an asshole. Don’t drive 70 while the rest of us are practicing safety. I don’t care for when a dumby truck driver splashes all that slush and mess on my windshield. Frankly, it pisses me off.
  4. Keep some blankets in the back seat. You never know when you might break down in the boonies and could freeze. Also, if you have a betty in the car, she’ll appreciate you offering her a blanket and will think you’re really smart for having blankets in the car.
  5. Don’t turn on your radio. All that is on is Christmas music and Christmas music sucks. Some people like it but I don’t see why Frosty the Raindeer coming to town is such a big deal.
  
  General ideas for gifts
  1.Give lots of gum and dental floss cause most people have bad breath and don’t know it. This is a great time to drop them a hint.
  2.I want an Ipad so I can check out jamesweiner.com anywhere I go.
  3.For Him: a set of hair clippers. I don’t need some fancy hair girl messing with my hair when I can do the same damn thing for free and you don’t even have to tip yourself so you save cash and spend it on….
  4.For Her: Some hot lingerie. That’s like a double gift because it works for you fellas and she feels all hot and stuff.
  5.ALWAYS BUY A GIFT THAT YOU LIKE AND CAN USE. One time, I got my mom some wrestling DVDs. She was like “James, what the hell am I gonna do with these” and I said “it’s the thought that counts asshole” and I stormed out of the house. Anyways, now I get to watch Wrestling DVDs! It was a gift for her but in a way it was kind of like I was buying it for myself even though I wasn’t.
  6. Lastly, make sure you offer good tidings. Everyone is so quick to write off tidings. When someone wishes me good tidings, it makes me feel good and want to buy them better gifts the next year.
  
  Hope I was of some help for your Christmas woes. Now maybe you won’t buy a shitty gift and have a niece/nephew/brother/daughter mad at you for the next year. Tis the season of Jolly!!!

  
  nle;rt
• Dr.Pizza

  

  Thanks all, happy holidays!
• I Wear Pants

  Tip one: Shoot. Them. All.
  Tip two: See tip one.
  Tip three: Booze.
• NYFan54

  

  I didn't see Cletus on this pole, so I didn't vote.
• baseballstud24

  You would like professional wrestling you troll. Grow up, Jerbs.
• Commander of Awesome

  

  tl;dr
• Early Cuyler

  

  Dr.Pizza;1003142 wrote:Folks, the Holidays are upon us!
  If there is one thing James Winner loves. It’s being with family, friends, and getting presents.
  Presents are cool because for the most part, most people don’t do anything good to deserve presents. Our family and relatives and friends are all just as stupid as one another and buy presents for each other. Black Friday has come and gone, so hopefully everyone got their stupid TVs and idiot electronics and technologies to shut them and the kids up. If there is one thing I don’t like, it’s whiny people who need technologies to enhance their lives. News Flash from jamesweiner.com, Mother Nature makes the best presents of them all. Next time some punk kids are in line at the store and won’t move up in line cause they’re too busy on their brain phones,I’m gonna tell them that Mother Nature is disappointed in them. Maybe that will straighten them up.
  
  With the Holidays, come crappy weathers. So here are a few tips for Holiday driving.
  1. Make sure you give yourself an extra 10-15 minutes to travel to the relatives or the stores. Sometimes the roads are slick and require more careful driving.
  2. Icy roads are very dangerous. A car can hit ice and slip into a ditch if a driver is not being cautious. Drive Slower!!!
  3. If it is snowing and you drive a truck, don’t be an asshole. Don’t drive 70 while the rest of us are practicing safety. I don’t care for when a dumby truck driver splashes all that slush and mess on my windshield. Frankly, it pisses me off.
  4. Keep some blankets in the back seat. You never know when you might break down in the boonies and could freeze. Also, if you have a betty in the car, she’ll appreciate you offering her a blanket and will think you’re really smart for having blankets in the car.
  5. Don’t turn on your radio. All that is on is Christmas music and Christmas music sucks. Some people like it but I don’t see why Frosty the Raindeer coming to town is such a big deal.
  
  General ideas for gifts
  1.Give lots of gum and dental floss cause most people have bad breath and don’t know it. This is a great time to drop them a hint.
  2.I want an Ipad so I can check out jamesweiner.com anywhere I go.
  3.For Him: a set of hair clippers. I don’t need some fancy hair girl messing with my hair when I can do the same damn thing for free and you don’t even have to tip yourself so you save cash and spend it on….
  4.For Her: Some hot lingerie. That’s like a double gift because it works for you fellas and she feels all hot and stuff.
  5.ALWAYS BUY A GIFT THAT YOU LIKE AND CAN USE. One time, I got my mom some wrestling DVDs. She was like “James, what the hell am I gonna do with these” and I said “it’s the thought that counts asshole” and I stormed out of the house. Anyways, now I get to watch Wrestling DVDs! It was a gift for her but in a way it was kind of like I was buying it for myself even though I wasn’t.
  6. Lastly, make sure you offer good tidings. Everyone is so quick to write off tidings. When someone wishes me good tidings, it makes me feel good and want to buy them better gifts the next year.
  
  Hope I was of some help for your Christmas woes. Now maybe you won’t buy a shitty gift and have a niece/nephew/brother/daughter mad at you for the next year. Tis the season of Jolly!!!