Parental care

• Belly35

  

  Parental care
  
  What will happen to your parents or parent?
  
  When my mom got older and sick she was living at her house. It was difficult to manage her and also take care of our family needs in that situation. We had come to the point of making arrangements for assistant living. She had a stroke and passed away quickly.
  
  Who will take care of your parents/parent if one should die and the other needs help or what arrangements are you prepared for if any?
• Con_Alma

  My father didn't get married until his parents dies. As the oldest of four brothers he felt it his responsibility to care for them.
  
  As my father aged, knowing he had a LTC policy with a 60 month benefit, it wasn't an option for me and my wife knowing what he had chose to do with his parents. He lived with us and had an in home nurse visiting, at the end daily. He was with us until he chose to begin hospice. He wanted to die in the house he built when he returned from WWII so we moved him back their and my sisters and I took turns staying the night and alternating days until he passed.
  
  I will never forget those days. It was very difficult on all of us and yet maybe one of the most rewarding times of my life.
• June18

  My parents took care of me for 18+ years, I'll reciprocate if it's needed.
• Cat Food Flambe'

  

  We had to move my Dadfrom his home in a small town in Southern Ohio into an assisted living facility last year. He has his own suite, and until recently could have his dog with him. It's five minutes from my home, and as a result he visits or goes places with us several nights a week. As he starts to move into the middle stages of Alzheimer's, we can move him into a more complete level of care within the same facility. I'm fortunate - Dad was able to save enough over the years to allow his pension, social security, and investment income to generate enough to cover his expenses.
  
  My mother-in-law, however, is actually worse than broke thanks to my jackbat father-in-law - she has to live on about $1000 a month and still owes about $90,000 on a house they bought in 1974 for about $30,000 (don't ask how they managed THAT trick). At present, she lives with us - one her daughters is moving to a house in the family's hometown this winter that has a mother-in-law suite, and the MIL will be able to stay with the rest of the family and her friends close by. Eventually, Alzheimer's and a a very hard life will claim her as well, and the family will have to place her in a Medicare nursing facility. Learn from their fail, you guys.
  
  As you can imagine, it's all taking a toll on my wife and I - it's like raising children all over again in reverse.
• THE4RINGZ

  

  I have one sister who is a nurse but I don't see her stepping up to take care of my parents. I will watch over them when necessary which isn't that far off, as they are in their mid 70's.
• June18

  As you can imagine, it's all taking a toll on my wife and I - it's like raising children all over again in reverse.

  It's amazing to me how much of a cycle life is....if you live to be old enough you go out of this world needing as much care and help as you did when you came into this world.
• O-Trap

  

  If necessary, I would take care of my parents in a heartbeat.
• j_crazy

  

  Id take my folks in if I could convince them to leave the mid Ohio valley.
• power i

  

  I have 3 sisters and 3 of us live in the same town as my parents. One of them lives 2 houses down from them. They are both in relatively good health but getting to the point where they sometimes need help with certain chores. We all visit often and they usually have something they need help with whenever one of us stops by. I have the most wonderful brother-in-law who goes by every Tuesday and spends his day doing whatever needs done.
  
  My parents have planned well for their future but between the four of us and God willing, they will never need to see the inside of a nursing home.
• FatHobbit

  

  I'm an only child so I do feel fairly responsible for my parents. (They are divorced.)
  
  My mother has tried to make good choices in her life and she should be fairly comfortable. I will help her with anything she needs.
  
  My dad has never thought beyond the moment and has made some ridiculously poor life choices that led to his divorce and alienating every friend he had. He spends whatever money he gets and has maxed out his credit cards. His truck broke down last year and the bank wouldn't load him enough to get it fixed so I had to "loan" him $600. He called me last week to let me know he was getting bored because I hadn't had time to spend with him for a couple of days. I don't mind helping him out because he raised me and he was a very good father, but I don't know what changed for him after that. I don't feel like I should suffer because of his choices and I am not responsible for his continual entertainment. My wife and I plan to move in the next four years and I don't know what he will do then. I'll still help when I can, but we will be a lot farther apart than we are now.