How do you deal with Jehovah witness?

• Sonofanump

  Quint;753290 wrote:My grandfather once told me how he dealt with them:
  
  "I had been drinking the night before so I was a little hungover and cranky when I went to the door. I opened it up, and there were two girls, one not bad looking, the other hideous. They told me they were Jehovah witnesses and they wanted a moment of my time to tell me about God. I responded by pointing at the cute one, telling her that she could come in and tell me about God, but the other one had to wait outside. They both left immediately."

  What if they are both nice looking, I had two young JW's that gave me sinful thoughts knock on my door a few weeks back. If I were single I would have actually invited them in to listen to them thinking about going to hell the whole time.
• tuskytuffguy

  The same way I deal with annoying bitches, dry-fuck em in the ass.
• NNN

  

  Generally anything that involves firing a gun into the air and yelling "Allahu akbar!" works pretty well.
• cbus4life

  tuskytuffguy;753789 wrote:The same way I deal with annoying bitches, dry-fuck em in the ass.

  
  lol
• ZWICK 4 PREZ

  

  I just tell them I'm Catholic and they usually leave me alone.
• coyotes22

  

  ZWICK 4 PREZ;754002 wrote:I just tell them I'm Catholic and they usually leave me alone.

  
  Same with Baptist.
• BCBulldog

  

  Invite them in. Offer them a beer. When they refuse, I just say, "Fine, that's more for me." Then, I proceed to get plastered in front of them. It works well with the Mormons, too.
• BCBulldog

  

  Sonofanump;753780 wrote:What if they are both nice looking, I had two young JW's that gave me sinful thoughts knock on my door a few weeks back. If I were single I would have actually invited them in to listen to them thinking about going to hell the whole time.

  
  If they are both good looking, pick one and tell the other to wait outside for her turn.
• mrtinkertrain

  Death Metal terrifies the Witnesses.
• FairwoodKing

  I tell them I'm gay and if they want to come in, I'll tell them all about my sexuality.
• Bio-Hazzzzard

  

  FairwoodKing;755034 wrote:I tell them I'm gay and if they want to come in, I'll tell them all about my sexuality.

  In all fairness if they do come in they should sit and hear your side of it as well, it is your property.
• OSH

  

  I want to talk with them. I think it'd be interesting and fun. I had a couple of young boys stop by about a month ago. I didn't invite them in...too creepy to do that to young boys. It was awful they made this little 10 year old try to read/repeat something to me, he could barely talk he was so nervous.
  
  I don't get the opportunity to talk to them that often. I wish I did. Same goes with Mormons. I'd talk with them. The problem is they are so on a "mission" to proselytize to so many people, they give out their information and then move on.
• Leonardo

  

  We got one at work a couple weeks ago. I listened then wondered off like I had something to do while others listened.
  
  Two came yesterday while the lady and I were getting around for the day (I was hurrying to work). She listened while I dressed the son. Eventually, I was done dressing him and I and needed to get out of the door. I hollered "Yes, we know Jesus loves us, but come on!!" They heard me and ended the conversation.
• vball10set

  
• OSH

  

  luckydog;753591 wrote:I just let the 3 dogs out and let them have some fun..

  
  [video=youtube;1uaPs8sxqB0][/video]
• password

  

  They are a joke, with all their preaching and brainwashing bull. We have a couple of them that live down the street and they are hypocrites with all their preaching. The one family is a decent family and well respected in the community but the other one has had affairs on his wife with younger girls he coaches and used to coach in high school and even uses his so called home business to hook up with other women but goes around preaching this garbage.The school won't do anything about it because he was hired before he decided to become a Jehovah and they are scared he will file a lawsuit against them for discriminating against his religious beliefs. The school fired him years ago for accusations of him messing around with girls he was coaching but rehired him a couple of years ago again because the girl was 18 yrs old. He likes to files lawsuits any chance he gets. They should be treated like any other intruder on your property, dealt with any means available to protect your family and home from their unwanted trespassing.
• Skyhook79

  

  "They should be treated like any other intruder on your property, dealt with any means available to protect your family and home from their unwanted trespassing"
  
  
  
  For knocking on your door?
• password

  

  Skyhook79;755754 wrote:"They should be treated like any other intruder on your property, dealt with any means available to protect your family and home from their unwanted trespassing"
  
  
  
  For knocking on your door?

  
  Yes, if you are a uninvited stranger you have no reason to be on my property. They are a Cult and do nothing but brainwash the weak minded.
• Mooney44Cards

  

  password;755733 wrote:They are a joke, with all their preaching and brainwashing bull. We have a couple of them that live down the street and they are hypocrites with all their preaching. The one family is a decent family and well respected in the community but the other one has had affairs on his wife with younger girls he coaches and used to coach in high school and even uses his so called home business to hook up with other women but goes around preaching this garbage.The school won't do anything about it because he was hired before he decided to become a Jehovah and they are scared he will file a lawsuit against them for discriminating against his religious beliefs. The school fired him years ago for accusations of him messing around with girls he was coaching but rehired him a couple of years ago again because the girl was 18 yrs old. He likes to files lawsuits any chance he gets. They should be treated like any other intruder on your property, dealt with any means available to protect your family and home from their unwanted trespassing.

  
  Oh good, so that makes them like every other form of Christianity out there.
  
  I know a lot of this thread is good-natured "lol Jehovah's Witnesses are annoying" stuff but really, I mean they are no worse than every other form of Christianity except they are a bit more aggressive than most others. Yes they can probably be considered a cult, but tell me this, if you walked into a Catholic, or Greek Orthodox, or Lutheran or Baptist church and had no idea who Jesus Christ was and had never been exposed to organized religion, wouldn't you think they are cults too? I mean seriously organized religion=big cults.
  
  And they are allowed to drink alcohol, so I'm not sure what that comment was about.
  
  And they were sent to the concentration camps along with the Jews during WWII, so I'm willing to cut them some slack.
  
  Really if the worst thing that happens in your day is you have to tell Jehovah's Witnesses more than once to go away, you have a pretty good life, and I envy that you get to complain about such frivolous things.
• mella

  Invite them in, slowly strip naked as they talk to you, tuck your pecker between your legs and ask them if they like to dance. It gets rid of my in-laws, should work on Jehovah witnesses.
• password

  

  Mooney44Cards;756357 wrote:Oh good, so that makes them like every other form of Christianity out there.
  
  I know a lot of this thread is good-natured "lol Jehovah's Witnesses are annoying" stuff but really, I mean they are no worse than every other form of Christianity except they are a bit more aggressive than most others. Yes they can probably be considered a cult, but tell me this, if you walked into a Catholic, or Greek Orthodox, or Lutheran or Baptist church and had no idea who Jesus Christ was and had never been exposed to organized religion, wouldn't you think they are cults too? I mean seriously organized religion=big cults.
  
  And they are allowed to drink alcohol, so I'm not sure what that comment was about.
  
  And they were sent to the concentration camps along with the Jews during WWII, so I'm willing to cut them some slack.
  
  Really if the worst thing that happens in your day is you have to tell Jehovah's Witnesses more than once to go away, you have a pretty good life, and I envy that you get to complain about such frivolous things.

  
  Let me guess, you are either banging a Jehovah or are one yourself.
  They are not the same as all other religions, They can't take no for an answer and continue trying to push their beliefs on other people when not invited. They deprive their kids of the normal traditions of America.
  
  As for thinking the other religions would be a cult if you had never been around organized religion before, I don't believe I would think that way. Other religions do not force you out if you question their beliefs, associate with people of other religions, work for the government or own an American flag. You need to ask yourself, how many other religions encourage you to beat your children in the back room if they can't keep quite during their weekly meetings.
• OSH

  

  Technically, all religions are "cults" by definition:
  
  "a particular system of religious worship, especially with reference to its rites and ceremonies."
• Mooney44Cards

  

  password;756741 wrote:Let me guess, you are either banging a Jehovah or are one yourself.
  They are not the same as all other religions, They can't take no for an answer and continue trying to push their beliefs on other people when not invited. They deprive their kids of the normal traditions of America.
  
  As for thinking the other religions would be a cult if you had never been around organized religion before, I don't believe I would think that way. Other religions do not force you out if you question their beliefs, associate with people of other religions, work for the government or own an American flag. You need to ask yourself, how many other religions encourage you to beat your children in the back room if they can't keep quite during their weekly meetings.

  
  Thanks for showing further ignorance of the topic.
• password

  

  Mooney44Cards;756996 wrote:Thanks for showing further ignorance of the topic.

  
  
  I don't like them and you do, Maybe you can invite them in for brunch the next time they stop by your place. Your answer was classic, the little hypocrite that lives up the road from me likes to use the same comment when confronted with facts of how screwed up his beliefs are and how he cheats and lies every chance he gets but wants to be a Jehovah when it benefits him. Why do they continue to recruit like dogs in heat if there will only be 144,000 of them going to heaven?
• Raw Dawgin' it

  

  password;757235 wrote:I don't like them and you do, Maybe you can invite them in for brunch the next time they stop by your place. Your answer was classic, the little hypocrite that lives up the road from me likes to use the same comment when confronted with facts of how screwed up his beliefs are and how he cheats and lies every chance he gets but wants to be a Jehovah when it benefits him. Why do they continue to recruit like dogs in heat if there will only be 144,000 of them going to heaven?

  
  This thread might have to be nominated for the OC HOF.