How easily do you forgive??

• Pick6

  

  What actions will you and what wont you forgive? What makes you forgive somebody? What is the most serious thing you have even forgiven somebody for?
  
  Im in a situation right now where I want to forgive somebody, but I dont think I should..but then again I'm a stubborn person as it is.
• Con_Alma

  I forgive very easily to most everyone but it doesn't mean my actions don't change as I carry on.
  
  There are times I am at the mercy of others to forgive me. I try my best to extend that courtesy to all others.
• CenterBHSFan

  

  Well, forgiveness doesn't always mean "it's ok, we're friends again" or something along those lines.
  You can forgive somebody without actively engaging with them.
  
  Many degrees of what I would consider unforgiveable. So, I reserve the right to pick and choose accordingly.
• Red_Skin_Pride

  

  CenterBHSFan;742360 wrote:Well, forgiveness doesn't always mean "it's ok, we're friends again" or something along those lines.
  You can forgive somebody without actively engaging with them.
  
  Many degrees of what I would consider unforgiveable. So, I reserve the right to pick and choose accordingly.

  
  Agree with this. Most of the time, it's not something serious enough that I don't forgive them and the relationship continues on as it was before (significant other, friend, relative etc). Occasionally there will be that situation where I might forgive you, but the relationship is going to change and not be the same as it was prior. Had this happen with a co-worker a while ago who I was really good friends with. He did something very very stupid that I forgave him for, but we are not nearly as close now and rarely talk outside of work anymore. I've only had one person in my life I haven't been able to forgive, and probably will be the only person ever so I think that's a pretty good ratio lol.
• Pick6

  

  Con_Alma;742359 wrote: There are times I am at the mercy of others to forgive me. I try my best to extend that courtesy to all others.

  
  Thats a good point. My situation is where I just found out my ex made out with my first cousin when we were dating. We've been broken up for 9 months and she just now told me. I broke up with her and she made me feel like the bad person the whole time. I think I can forgive her because she actually told me because I didnt even expect this happened, she just came out and told me because she thought I needed to know. And I really do believe she is sorry and if she had the chance to go back she wouldnt have done it. She done it when we were fighting as well, even though that doesnt make it excusable.
  
  Second person, is obviously, my first cousin. Not only is he my first cousin, I considered him my best friend while growing up. I knew he was like this (didnt care about doing stuff with a girl if they were dating somebody), but honestly never thought he would do that to me. He hasnt even tried to apologize yet, he is the type of person who has never really had to step up and be held accountable in his life. I do suspect he will try to apologize at one point....I just dont see how I can ever forgive him.
  
  Third person is one of my other best friends from home (sad, I know). He was there that night and heard about it..but he never said anything because he said he didnt want to start anything, and he apologized. He is also good friends with my cousin, so I can see how he would want to protect him as well. Looking at his situation, it is a tough situation because he was in the middle and no matter what somebody would be pissed at him. Im pretty sure that I will forgive him.
  
  also, this wasnt just some relationship.. I was with this girl pretty much 2 years
• hasbeen

  

  1) ex-gf: who cares? She's an ex for another reason.
  
  2) cousin: now that's fucked up. You're going to have to forgive him, but the trust is gone. My buddy fucked the girl my other buddy was talking to and he was mad for a while. But it ain't worth losin a friendship over.
  
  3) other friend: if he's friends with you both then you can't be too mad. I knew the situation above and I told my one friend to confess. But im not gonna sell my other friend out. They weren't dating and the other guy already lost her by then. It was just making out. Your friend shouldn't of sold out your cousin.
• OSH

  

  pnhasbeen;742475 wrote:1) ex-gf: who cares? She's an ex for another reason.
  
  2) cousin: now that's fucked up. You're going to have to forgive him, but the trust is gone. My buddy fucked the girl my other buddy was talking to and he was mad for a while. But it ain't worth losin a friendship over.
  
  3) other friend: if he's friends with you both then you can't be too mad. I knew the situation above and I told my one friend to confess. But im not gonna sell my other friend out. They weren't dating and the other guy already lost her by then. It was just making out. Your friend shouldn't of sold out your cousin.

  I agree 100% about #1.
  
  On #'s 2 and 3, I dunno. Some friends are worth keeping, others aren't. If someone knew about my girl cheating on me and didn't tell me, I'd be pretty upset. It's hard to forget about a family member sometimes, other times it's not. Some people are worth being around, others aren't. Good time friends and good friends...one is only there occasionally, the other is there all the time. I'd rather have those good friends all the time.
• Laley23

  

  I forgive about as easily as anyone in the world lol. Im about as carefree as anyone in the world as well though.
  
  It aint worth the time and effort to actually care, and actively hold a grudge or be angry at someone. Ive had girlfriends cheat on me, friends rat on me, etc. I usually get mad for about a day and when I wake up Im cool. Just dont really see the need to stay angry. Now, it doesnt mean I am going to forget, or keep dating you if you cheat (situations always matter as well). But I certainly am not going to care and have it affect anything.
• fortfan

  I forgive easily. But...to be forgiven the person has to ask to be forgiven and apologize. The one person I have not forgiven is a former best friend that lied to me about an affair he was having....said he wasn't having sex with the woman (the thing was-I didn't ask....he just told me)...but just a few months later she's having his kid. Pretty obvious he lied-but he has never apologized or even acknowledged that he lied.
• justincredible

  

  I'm like an elephant, I never forgive.
• Pick6

  

  fortfan;742505 wrote:I forgive easily. But...to be forgiven the person has to ask to be forgiven and apologize. The one person I have not forgiven is a former best friend that lied to me about an affair he was having....said he wasn't having sex with the woman (the thing was-I didn't ask....he just told me)...but just a few months later she's having his kid. Pretty obvious he lied-but he has never apologized or even acknowledged that he lied.

  were you dating the woman at the time or something?
  
  I guess the reason I cant let it go is because I was actually thinking of trying to get back with this girl..just weird, and dont know if ill ever get over the fact that my family & best friend did it to me even though it was only kissing..maybe I am making too much of it.
• se-alum

  

  Laley23;742503 wrote:I forgive about as easily as anyone in the world lol. Im about as carefree as anyone in the world as well though.
  
  It aint worth the time and effort to actually care, and actively hold a grudge or be angry at someone. Ive had girlfriends cheat on me, friends rat on me, etc. I usually get mad for about a day and when I wake up Im cool. Just dont really see the need to stay angry. Now, it doesnt mean I am going to forget, or keep dating you if you cheat (situations always matter as well). But I certainly am not going to care and have it affect anything.

  
  
  This is pretty much exactly how I am. I'm an extremely laid back person, and don't dwell on what I can't change. There's only been one person that I have had a hard time forgiving, and that's because she tried to make me feel like a POS, when come to find out, I was right all along. Even at that, I hold no ill will toward her, and will still talk occasionally, though the friendship will never be at the level it was.
• Curly J

  

  justincredible;742506 wrote:I'm like an elephant, I never forgive.

  You're not like an elephant, cause an elephant never forgets...you forgot, but I forgive you.
• mcburg93

  

  It really depends on the situation of the crime per say. If she did that with my cousin who else has she done it with. Are you sure a kiss is all that happened? I am always suspect with things like that. Its rough to forgive for situations like this cause in the back of you mind you will always have that doubt. It sucks and you would have to deal with that once you got back with her. I forgive depending on the situation if you steal from me I will never forgive you if you do my lady I will never forgive you but thats me.
• Mohican00

  

  justincredible;742506 wrote:I'm like an elephant, I never forgive.

  This is awesome. Give me vCash
• password

  

  justincredible;742506 wrote:I'm like an elephant, I never forgive.

  What about the software program, any luck?
  
  I thought it said I never forget.