ND to Adjust Stadium Attendance Records

• Tiernan

  Notre Dame AD, Jack Soreprick has announced his office is doing a "comprehensive & exhaustive" investigation to determine how many people actually attended the 8 ND Home football games last season. While every game was indeed a sell-out with all seats sold, photographic evidence reveals that thousands of seats were empty during the games. It is apparent now that many of these empty seats were indeed purchased by Irish male students and alumni for their imaginary girlfriends.
  
  It has long been known by College Football insiders that Notre Dame male students and supporters are such geeks, dweebs and nerds it is difficult for them to have "real" girlfriends so they frequently just invent them.
  
  According to sources a separate investigation is being conducted to determine whether Head Coach Brian Kelly is indeed married. Nobody has ever actually seen Kelly's wife which he speaks of as being, "...the most beautiful woman in the world." One needs only to take one look at the homely Kelly to be suspicious that such a hobbit of a man could get a real woman.
• ernest_t_bass

  

  This is just a terrible, terrible thread. You're climbing up the ladder, Tiernan, as the worst.
• Tiernan

  
  
  
  
  
  
  Amid swirling rumors of whether or not he is actually married or not Notre Dame HC, Brian Kelly is claiming this is a picture of his wife recently taken on vacation he says.
• Tiernan

  awwww poor little ETB is upset somebody is funnier than he is. QQ you pathetic fuck.
• ernest_t_bass

  

  Tiernan;1368919 wrote:awwww poor little ETB is upset somebody is funnier than he is. QQ you pathetic fuck.

  LOL.
  
  
• GoChiefs

  

  Tiernan;1368919 wrote:ETB is upset somebody is funnier than he is.

  Are you really bragging like this is some kind of an accomplishment?
• Tiernan

  Notre Dame Stadium - Special Reserved Section for Player's Girlfriends...
  
  
• sleeper

  

  ernest_t_bass;1368911 wrote:This is just a terrible, terrible thread. You're climbing up the ladder, Tiernan, as the worst.

  Apparently you've never met isadore.
• LJ

  

  Tiernan;1368919 wrote:awwww poor little ETB is upset somebody is funnier than he is. QQ you pathetic fuck.

  
  But you aren't funny or witty at all......
• Tiernan

  LJ;1369070 wrote:But you aren't funny or witty at all......

  I'm killing myself with knee slappers so fuuq you.
• vball10set

  Tiernan;1369057 wrote:Notre Dame Stadium - Special Reserved Section for Player's Girlfriends...
  
  

  Sorry, but this just isn't funny. Now, if the pic showed the stands full surrounding this area of empty seats, it may have a chance. This way, no chance at all.
  
  /con_alma'd
• Tiernan

  ^^^
  Use your imagination Vball...Teo did.
• vball10set

  Tiernan;1369116 wrote:^^^
  Use your imagination Vball...Teo did.

  touche'
• WebFire

  Tiernan;1369116 wrote:^^^
  Use your imagination Vball...Teo did.

  I admint, I LOL'd at this one.
• xKoToVxSyNdRoMe

  

  Expected a funny one liner that was not delivered. Would not read again.